Today I was asked why I do what I do.
Why do I coach? Why have I written a book? Why do I keep learning and expanding? Sometimes I struggle to express the answers to that.
Then I watched a podcast with Shar Moore as the guest (link below) and WOW, this lady knows how to tell her story and articulate her why, I am inspired to put my why into words more effectively after watching this.
Your “WHY” has to be rooted deeply in your history and psyche, it is what drives you, what inspires you, what feeds the motivating force in your life.
We all have a “WHY” but we don’t always know what that is until something dramatic occurs in our lives. Sometimes defining it is still challenging, but if you can dig deep and work it out, you will forever be inspired.
Going over the words I have used frequently to others, the picture of my why comes into sharper focus. The phrase “breaking free of familial and societal constraints” is one I use frequently, what does that mean for me?
For decades I heard the same response from my father, regardless of what I said or did, it was “don’t be stupid Dorothy” and that statement inferred at every level that I was indeed stupid.
Well he was wrong, I am not, and never was stupid. I am sure the words were simply duplicated from his father, which is even sadder.
When you have such negative programming going in multiple times a day as a child and at every interaction as an adult it binds and stifles your view of your place, capabilities and value in this world. To overcome that is a fight, a fight for your life.
The reticular activating system will seek out validation of the thoughts we have, and mine was working very well with those negatives, my mistakes were epic and seemingly very stupid at times, but always I survived, always I found answers, always I had a roof over my head, a job and food on my table, so I couldn’t be all bad.
Very slowly over the decades I worked out that I had a brain, that I could learn different skills quickly and that I was ambitious. There have been massive hurdles in recent years, but once again I forge forward.
Now in my 60’s I see younger women struggle with confidence, still fighting with negative programming from how they were raised, my heart breaks that they are going through that too, and I want that to stop.
Watching women who want something different in their lives but believing that they can’t take a new direction because they are a certain age, a mother, or any other supposed imposition.
I want to scream, “You can do what you want to do, don’t leave it as late as I have, break free NOW” You are all SO amazing, I am in awe of the younger women I come across daily, but also those closer to my age and older, we too can excel in our passions. Let’s do this.
I don’t want woman holding themselves back from their destinies. I don’t women believing the negative lies they have been told. I don’t want women waiting until later.
My big why is to inspire women to explore their possibilities, to believe in themselves and for them to choose NOW for their dreams.